Ten Commandments for the Twenty-First Century!

(Thanks to Richard Wiseman)

Heavily edited by MKG for superior medieval grammar. I can’t help it, folks!

  1. Thou shalt only commit adultery if thine is sure thou wilt get away with it
  2. Thou shalt not worship Microsoft, for it is a false god.
  3. Thou shalt not do unto others what thee does not wish upon thyself (masochists excepted).
  4. Thou shalt not sue nice but principled people for libel, especially when they have the resources to fight back and so destroy thine entire profession.
  5. Thou shalt not pretend you know what CERN does or is going to do.
  6. Thou shalt never admit her bum dost indeed “look big” in that.
  7. Thou shalt not talk about Fight Club.
  8. Thou shalt not buy anyone under the age of ten a mobile phone.
  9. Thou shalt be patient, for the patient shall inherit the cheaper, less buggy product.
  10. Thou shalt not have the Crazy Frog ring tone.